Because wine will never leave you.
“If you love wine so much, why don’t you marry it?” It’s one of those stupid lines that isn’t even funny after your second bottle of Pinot Grigio. But as silly as the joke may be, a guy in Portland, Oregon, is one step closer to making it a reality: Michael James Schneider has gotten some serious Twitter likes after building a boyfriend out of old wine boxes.
Yesterday, Schneider—on Twitter as BLCKSMTH—, “i do not have a boyfriend so i made one out of boxes of wine.” The post included four photos of him hanging out with his wine box beau, which is built out of brands like Franzia, Black Box, Bota Box and House Wine. The first pic features the two making spaghetti dinner, followed by shots of breakfast in bed, grocery shopping, and sharing an outdoor snuggle.
Nearly 40,000 likes and 9,000 retweets later, to Schneider to get the full scoop on his cardboard romance. The 44-year-old said the idea for the inanimate boyfriend, who he fittingly calls Franz, came after a breakup. “I usually mark art from leaning into and embracing the most humiliating parts of my life,” he told the paper. “When I’m klutzy, I take photos of me faceplanting. When I’m single and lonely and drinking… well why not create a companion out of that loneliness?”
Schneider said he grabbed a person-sized metal armature, used as a framework for sculptures, and began attaching wine boxes to it. He said it wasn’t long before he headed out to snap photos. “Even during the shoot in the grocery store, the locals hardly batted an eye,” he told the Metro. “We’re used to weird things in Portland.”
So what’s next for the couple? “The reception has been so great that I can imagine further adventures in the relationship,” Schneider added. “What happens when Box Wine Boyfriend meets my friends? Moves in with me? What if there are wedding bells in the future?” Still, these young lovebirds need to be careful: When you move this fast, things can end with a nasty hangover… in this case, literally.